Stay-at-Home Parents

» Diane Laney Fitzpatrick - Perspective

I'd love to see this discussion picked back up again. Anyone have anything to add?
Personally, I can't imagine anything less boring than a job where every day you do something different. You never know what's going to happen in any given day. At the same time, you're in charge! It's like running a small business (not a very profitable one, but still . . .)

» inspirangel - Perspective

Getting The Discussion Back Up Again ......

yes, Diane, I have something to say lol,lol!!

Boredom?? What boredom? - I am a part-homeschooling mother to 5 (college down to 8yrs), help hubbie run 2 businesses, refurbish properties,try to further my own education with online degree programmes, develop a home-tutoring business, develop my sadly-neglected self-publishing business, educate myself myself with even more music/literature/poetry/continue writing my moorland wildlife book/learn Irish and above all ..... like you all here ...WRITE !! (help!!- I need more time to fill, not less!)
Love your articles by the way!

-- posted by inspirangel

» Diane Laney Fitzpatrick - Perspective

Thanks! I feel the same way, although I'm not nearly as busy as you! Another thought - I always assumed that when my kids got older I would be less involved and things would be less interesting. I've found it's just the opposite. Having older kids is a laugh a minute.
Thanks for jump-starting a discussion here. These discussions are dying a slow death at times!
Diane

» tjirakova - Perspective

Hi I know this is a very late reply, but I just now found this website.. I'd like to make a comment about the boredom issue. I don't think it is either boredom or depression, neccessarily, but rather lonliness. Parents get lonely for some adult conversation after hours of reading children's books etc. It helps to have play dates where moms can join together for chats while the children enjoy new company.

-- posted by tjirakova

» Diane Laney Fitzpatrick - Perspective

I agree. You start to talk to you kids (and the dog) like they're your contemporaries and you get a lot of blank stares back.

I used to summarize whatever book I was reading to my kids in a storytelling type way. At the time I thought it was cool. Now, looking back, it was kind of sad . . . I think I needed a book club!!!

» daveinnh - Perspective

Hi, I'm a "mom" too. I found years ago that ANY job is boring sometimes. At home, once I get the kids off to school, I sit down and review my schedule for the day, decide on must do, should do, want to do, etc. Then I jump on the eliptical to get the juices flowing. It's amazing how even 10 minutes will get you rolling.
I have a regular coffee morning weekly on grocery day with REAL LIVE adults who work from home which allows me to practice using multi-syllabic words. I also try to take a free day once a week where, once the kids are at school, I do what I want for myself and/or my wife (I usually end up cheating and doing my "job" too at some point)just so I don't get behind.
If it's decent out, I'll take a walk and look for interesting things to show or tell my girls about when they get home.

Dave

-- posted by daveinnh

» Diane Laney Fitzpatrick - Perspective

Dave, I love your schedule. It's things like your typical week that makes us stay-at-home parents the envy of everyone else! And taking a walk to find interesting things to tell your girls when they get home - how lucky they are!
That's something I may start to work on. When I'm in the car with my kids and I'm trying to think of something to talk about, I sometimes realize my day was pretty dull and I can't think of a single thing to talk about.
Thanks, Dave!

» Angela England - Perspective

**laughing**

All I can say is a stay-at-home-mom complaining about boredom does not have MY kiddos running around her house! *laughing* My kids are so highly entertaining and now that they are 3 and 20 months and are talking ......oh my! Watch out! hehehehehe

We have SO much fun. It takes us 30 minutes just to wash one sinkload of dishes becuase I am scrubbing with my 20 month old (she scrubs first and then I scrub) and my 3 year old son rinses and puts them in the dish drainer. Then we get towels and mop the floor for 30 more minutes.

Yes - it takes me an hour to wash breakfast and lunch dishes and sweep./mop the floor. BUT we have FUN! I mean - SO much fun. And my kids are learning valuable skills of cooperation, team work, diligence, and that working alongside others can be a fun and enjoyable experience.

Chores? Not at this house! EVERYTHING is a play time!

Angela

» kidzee02 - Perspective

hi, I somehow stumbled on this forum and though I agree on the "wellness" and "feel good" factor that SAHMs experience when they are looking after their children, its not always true. And I will tell you why. My husband;s job has always been outside the home country(each abt 2yrs) and so I never has the support of family after marriage. To top that my first born was developmentally delayed and as now she grows older its clear she is mentally challenged. Shes been non verbal from day one. Does anyone have any insight to lighten my mental stress. I have been living in this vaccum of silence for nearly 7 years and now I feel I am reaching my breaking point. I have to make all the sounds at home and its the same alphabet story I keep telling her coz thats what she understands. Going out we do occasionally but cant stay outside all day, can we.?? I may sound embittered but I have lost out all my youth when I could have been working and reached some high psition today!!

-- posted by kidzee02

» Diane Laney Fitzpatrick - Perspective

You're absolutely right. Staying at home with children is not the dream-come-true job - not for everyone and not every day for anyone.

I feel for you, with a handicapped child and your husband away. You need some help, some time without a burden on you.

I would start with my doctor. Tell him or her that you're overwhelmed and you need help; you should get a referral to some type of support. It may be as simple as talking with other parents whose children are having the same difficulties as yours.

Remember, we've all been to the point of saying, "Why am I doing this?"

You're smart to recognize that you're nearing a breaking point. Please let someone know before you reach that point.

I would really like to hear how things are going for you. Email me.